


A Journey for Frisk

by SummerAngel



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Abandonment, Emotional Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-10-14
Updated: 2015-10-15
Packaged: 2018-04-26 10:44:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,404
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5001694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SummerAngel/pseuds/SummerAngel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Something of a plot bunny that has been on my mind for awhile after piecing together bits of somewhat unrelated re-occurring or hidden, flavor text from secret items, gameplay or dialogue throughout the game. Since you know, symbolism and all that sort of thing is my thing.<br/>Combined with my own headcanons and reasonings for Frisk’s behaviour throughout the game (and/or natural ‘player character’ curiosity behaviour), I had an idea for Frisk’s origin, why they went to the mountain in the first place, and why they continued to travel through the game world all the way to the end, and maybe even why they might reset, even when nothing went wrong per se…<br/>This is purely for the True Pacifist verse of the story though, combined with any details or backstory revealed through other routes, but no other routes actually take place. Frisk is always Frisk and whoever or whatever Chara is never appears. As far as this story is concerned they were never revived in the first place.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> Inspirational flavor text given in order without context so not really spoilers:  
> Also, Undertale OST – An Ending. I listened to this while I wrote it, maybe give a listen while you read?
> 
> “I just wasn’t ready for the responsibility.”  
> “You put the item on the ground, and gave it a little pat.”/“You bid a quiet farewell to the item.”/“You abandoned the item.”/“You threw away the item like the garbage it was.”/“The item was thrown away…”  
> “You put the item down and tell it you'll be right back.”  
> “Call for help. I dare you. Cry into the darkness. ‘Mommy!’ ‘Daddy!’ ‘Somebody help!’ See what good it does you.”  
> “You called for help…”  
> “But nobody came.”  
> “You really ARE an idiot.”  
> “Legends say that those who climbed the mountain never return….”  
> 

You remember walking with her somewhere, slowly, with her hands in yours. She was quiet, but it was a comforting silence. You can’t remember exactly where you were heading, but you knew it was further than you’ve ever walked together before. You’ve walked with her plenty of times and it always so much fun. You just remember that eventually you came to a bench when she stopped and spoke to you.

“Frisk, I need you to stay here for a bit, do you understand?” you looked up at her and nodded

“I can’t take you with me where I’m going today, but I promise, I’ll be back as soon as I can.” You smiled and gave her a hug, you understood, you knew this happened sometimes. Children couldn’t always be taken everywhere after all. As a big kid of 10 years old you understood at least that. 

Her hands were warm and gentle as she patted the hair on your head, put your fluffy hat on and made sure your scarf was wound tight and warm. She held you very close for a moment, as if to pass on as much warmth and love to you in an instant as she possibly could. She let go long enough to kiss your cheeks all over as you giggled and smiled at her.

“Goodbye, Frisk. I love you.” She said as she ruffled your hair once more while placing you on the bench to sit.

You waved goodbye to her as she left, in the direction of the mountain. While the feeling of her hands on your cheeks were still warm.

And you waited.

And you waited for a very long time.

Long enough to start feeling very lonely.

Long enough to start to worry if something had gone wrong.

Was she alright? Was she running late? Oh, what if she was bringing back something fun? She’s done that before, that must be it.

And you waited even longer.

Long enough for it to become cold and dark.

Long enough to start becoming afraid.

Long enough for your worries to bubble up in your throat as you called out, just on the off chance she was just around the corner and just taking her time.

“Hello? Are you almost back?”

But there was nothing but cold silence. You called out louder, just in case she didn’t hear. 

“MOM!”

Still nothing. Now you started worrying, something must be wrong, she isn’t okay, what if she’s hurt? She’s stuck somewhere, I know she is. Starting to panic, you had the thought you should tell someone she’s missing and called out again, too afraid to go too far away from the bench, just in case she came back.

“Somebody help!”

But nobody came. Panicking, your thoughts scatter as you decided you’ll have to go find her. Where was she last? Where did she go? You turn your head to face the mountain and remember whispered rumours once again.

“Legends say that those who climbed the mountain never return….”

She didn’t… leave to climb the mountain… did she?

But if she did… Ah that was it! She must trapped somewhere up there! No wonder she said she couldn’t take you, the mountains too dangerous everyone knows that! …No wonder nobody came when you called for help, everyone’s too scared to go up there, no one would come with you if you left to rescue her!

If you left…

You looked back towards the bench, still unsure….she said to stay here until she comes back.

What if she comes back after you left?

But what if she really is trapped up there? It’s the only explanation!

The glittering stars near the moon, twinkling above mountain on a clear night sky fills you with determination.

You have to go help her. You have to go find her.

At once, you run off towards the mountain.


	2. The Entrance to the Ruins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I wonder how long I should make chapters actually? I'm not too sure  
> I'm kinda leaning towards making a chapter for each sort of area in the game, like the Ruins, Snowdin, Waterfall, The Hotlands and the Core/The End, but I wonder if that would make them too long??  
> Oh well, I'll try multiple short chapters first and see how it goes  
> Also, you might notice a pattern on how I'm liking to end all my chapters lol

You had only just gotten halfway up the mountain, before it got very cold and very snowy. Shivering, you found a crack in the wall to lean into away from the wind.

You didn’t find any footsteps. No clues she was here.

The snow probably covered them up as they fell.

And the path ended quite a while ago so you’re not really sure where she was intending to go up here. Why did she come? What was she looking for? You’ve been stumbling through forest and rock feeling more frustrated and upset for a while now...

You sat in the snow and tried to make yourself warm again, you wanted to find her, but you wanted to go back too, where it was warmer… No. You just had to wait it out until she came back. You should have just waited there like she said in the first place. Now she’ll be upset you didn’t listen to her, you didn’t trust her. How could you not trust her? She’ll be so hurt.

Tearing up you started to frown at your own thoughts before getting up again and starting to walk back down, frightened that you made a mistake in your judgement.

You didn’t get very far until you slipped on the snow on your way down. Crying out, you realize you were right above a hidden hole in the ground as you slipped through the snowy covering, down into the caves on the mountainside.

_“You just need some love, don’t you sweetie?” They say with a wink in their eyes. You never understood what it ever meant, only that she told you to sweetly smile, bat your eyelashes and look cute because people always help and give things to cute looking children._

Waking up, you realize you are lying sideways on the ground, on top of a pile of sweet smelling flowers. Sitting and looking up, you see the faraway hole in the dark ceiling where you must have fell in where the only light is shining through. Looking around everywhere, you realize there is no way back up. The only exit is through the stone doors on the other side of the room.

Oh no, now you’re lost as well! How will you find her now if she’s lost and you’re lost?? How will either of you get back??

Scrambling to your feet worried about the time you’ve wasted already and the time you’re wasting now, you run towards the door and push against it with all might. It creaks open and you run through, nearly crushing a patch of flowers as a voice speaks up behind you.

“You’re new to the underground, aren’tcha?” You turn around confused, who spoke?? You see nothing but flowers.

“Golly you must be confused.” Says a voice nearer to the ground. Looking down more closely at the flower patch, you notice one of them has a face.

“Someone oughtta teach how things work around here! I guess little old me will have to do.” The single flower says as it winks at you. You walk forward only to have a strange sensation overcome you.

You see your heart float out and glow in front of you. You’re so mesmerized by the strange sight, you nearly miss everything the flower has to say.

“You want some LOVE don’t you?” Ah, you recognized that. Smiling sweetly you nod your head, remembering that looking cute for people might help or make them want to help you, just like she said.

“Don’t worry, I’ll share some with you.” The flower says as it winks again. Suddenly you feel a small surge of…. Something in the air, as the flower magically conjures a bunch of glowing white orbs

“Down here, love is shared through little white….’friendliness pellets’” Huh? But that looks like something magic….

“Are you ready? Get as many as you can!” Suddenly they zoom towards you and hit you. You fall back onto the ground in shock at the sudden pain coming from everywhere. Before you can even open your mouth to say ow, you look back up at the flower to see it had deformed its face into something horrific.

“YOU IDIOT. DOWN HERE ITS KILL OR BE KILLED.” Frightened you move backwards only to have yourself suddenly surrounding by more of its conjured magic. Horrific laughter echoes out from the flower as it once again casts its magic against you.

“DIE.”

Suddenly flames surround you and dissipate the white magic before it can reach you. It spreads out to burn the menacing flower, chasing it away and stops just as suddenly as it started.

“What a terrible creature, torturing a poor innocent youth…” Your eyes open wide as you see a large humanoid goat towering above you.

“Ah, do not be afraid my child. I am Toriel. Caretaker of the Ruins. I pass through here everyday to see if anyone has fallen down.” You perk up at that, sitting up you quickly to ask her if anyone else has fallen down here.

“Oh? You are the first human to fall here in a long while.” Huddling down and holding yourself, because you still feel pain a little, you feel confused. The pain mixed with the hurt makes your eyes tear up again.

She’s not here? But then, where?

Where did she go?

Ah, Toriel must not have seen her, and she did not leave for the mountains too long ago! She must have already left this place! Perhaps down here is where she meant to go and she just continued on her way? The old goat’s eyes soften as they see you are upset.

“Ah, come. I will guide you through the catacombs.” You wipe your eyes quickly and get up to follow her. The faster you can leave this place, the faster you can go find her!

As you run after her into the Ruins, you notice the shadow of the Ruins looming above, and it fills you with determination.

 


	3. The Ruins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sooo, this is a very long chapter lol  
> But that is because this is the entire Ruins chapter, much bigger area than the first two chapter areas.  
> Im still wondering if I should maybe cut it in half somewhere..but I'll leave it like this for now.  
> Maybe leave some feedback on which is easier to read?

Toriel walked you through the ruins, explaining the puzzle doorkeys to you, and teaching you bits about their history. She explained the ways of monsters to you, who may fight you, or be angry. But if you simply smile and talk to them, then it would resolve itself or she would come to help. Monsters did not seem so different than humans in this way. You already knew much the same from what she taught you.

You listened raptly because it was all so interesting to you none the less, but something kept leaving a twisting feeling in your gut.

It was whenever Toriel mentioned home, or rather, your “new” home.

You… weren’t sure what to do. She saved you, and has been very kind to you even still. You understood the puzzles very easily, and she was so overjoyed every time you managed to figure one out, even with her obvious help.

You came down here for a reason, you had to find her!

Well… you fell down here by accident, but here is where you were meant to go. She must have come down here too, after all, it does look like it’s the only place to even go to all the way up this mountain.

Every growing moment with Toriel and her slow gentle guidance through the ruins made you feel anxious about the time spent here and time wasted not looking, and yet…

She was so kind. Showering you with praise at every turn, holding your hand when she felt it was too dangerous to proceed alone... It, honestly made you feel a little embarrassed. What have you done to earn this niceness from her? You’ve only just met her, in fact she’s already saved you. You feel uneasy, like you are already overstepping your bounds, asking for anything more might be pushing it.

But if you said anything to upset her, or correct her, then you would be a rude person on top of that. You felt more uneasy at the thought that speaking up would make you seem ungrateful, so you said nothing whenever she mentioned your “new home”.

She stopped you both when you got one room in particular.

“You’ve done so well thus far, but. I have something difficult to ask of you.” She looks a little troubled. Before you can wonder what’s wrong she suddenly walks forward.

“I want you to walk to the end of this room without me. Forgive me for this.” Startled you start to walk up to her to be closer but she’s gone in a flash.

And you’re left alone again in a strange empty place.

Your stomach is in knots as you run forward, scared and not knowing what to expect. Previously unthought of questions bubble up to the surface of your mind.

Did I make her upset? Did I offend her? What did I do wrong? Why did she leave?

Where did she go, if not here?

The effort to run combined with the lump in your throat did not help how hard you were breathing, and finally made tears fall from your face that you had no time to stop.

What if I can’t get out of here now? I won’t find her!

You pass near the column at the end of the room when Toriel suddenly appears again.

“Greetings, my child. Do not worry, I did not leave you. I was merely behind this pillar the whole time.” You’re hit with a wave of relief and you wipe your face, again not wanting to look rude. She never really left, of course she didn’t.

“Thankyou for trusting me.” She smiled warmly at you, and just as quickly as it came, the relief left and was replaced with guilt.

You didn’t trust her.

Her next few words were lost on you but you caught that she had to leave for real this time, to attend to some business, and that you must remain here. Alone. Again. You fretted what you were going to do again.

How can you get anywhere here without Toriel? You hear her ask you to wait for her to solve the puzzles, but you just can’t do that!

Noticing your tear stained, worrying face. Toriel reached for her pockets and spoke softly to you.

“Here. I have an idea. I will give you this cellphone with my number on it. If you have need for anything, just call.” You accept the phone from her hands as she turns to leave.

“Be good, alright?” You nod and look down at the device in your hands, before quickly shoving it in your pockets and wanting to hurry to the next room.

Ah, but she said to stay here…

Fiddling with the phone in your pocket for a few moments, unsure of what to do. You need to find her, but you don’t want to be rude to Toriel.

Lost in your thoughts, you are startled when the phone suddenly rings.

“Hello? This is Toriel. You have not left the room, have you? The puzzles ahead I have yet to explain, and it would be dangerous to try to solve them on your own. Be good, Alright?” You quietly whisper your affirmation and satisfied, she hangs up.

Walking through the rooms, exploring everywhere you can, every nook and cranny for some sort of sign (a bowl of candy?? No, that can’t be her doing...) you encounter a few creatures. Learning how to compliment frogs was definitely something new. What exactly were you say to frogs to compliment them? ‘Your skin is looking especially green today?’ Ah, but they have white skin, not green…

You are startled once more as your phone rings, breaking up your thoughts. You quickly answer the phone to once again hear Toriel’s voice.

“Hello? This is Toriel. For no reason in particular… Which do you prefer? Cinnamon? Or Butterscotch?”

“Butterscotch?” you wonder out loud, thinking that you haven’t tasted that before.

“Oh I see. Thankyou very much!” and before you can think to ask what for she hangs up.

You take only a few steps forward before it rings again, asking if you did not dislike cinnamon, would you still eat something with cinnamon in it? Flustered you reassure her quickly that of course you would! You think to yourself that you would never be so rude as to refuse food based on taste.

“I understand, thankyou for being so patient by the way.” You are silent again as you hang up. You reassure yourself that you must get through these ruins quickly….

The puzzles were not so difficult, and it was very comforting to know that at any moment you could speak to Toriel, if you ever were in danger.

Not that you’d straight out ask for her to come back and help you out for a few cuts and bruises while she was doing her errands. There were many creatures in these ruins, each with their own magical nature, and learning how to speak to each of them was a bit of a learning curve.

But it was nothing you couldn’t handle.

You even met a dapper ghost that you weren’t sure if they wanted to be friends or not, they seemed quite down. But at least you were able to make them laugh a little before they left. You’ve always thought that was the best way to cheer someone up.

As you walk, once again Toriel calls you with some small talk and updates. Each time it startles you less and less, but also makes you a little bit happier that she is nice enough to keep checking up on you. Even If you did wander away from where she said to stay.

You even work up the courage to call her once or twice, but can think of nothing to say except “Hello.” She doesn’t seem to mind though.

You walk through one last door before Toriel calls you again. When you go to answer your phone you don’t see her walking up to you from the other end of the room.

“How did you get here my child? Are you hurt? There, there, I will heal you.” She looks over concerned over the few little scrapes you got since she left.

“I should not have left you alone for so long…” You feel embarrassed again as she coddles you, murmuring her worries as she fusses over your health.

“Come! Small one.” She smiles at you and turns, expecting you to follow. You do, closely, happy that she is back again to take you out. Instead she leads to a cozy little house in the ruins and invites you inside.

“Do you smell that? Surprise!” Toriel grins as you get a whiff of a lovely warm smell.

“It is a butterscotch-cinnamon pie. I thought we might celebrate your arrival. I want you to have a nice time living here.” The smell turns sour in your mouth as your stomach flip flops between butterflies at the kindness Toriel has shown and cold fear of being rude enough to refuse her offer. You can think of nothing to say, but you are saved by the fact that Toriel speaks up again.

“Here, I have another surprise for you.” She walks excitedly to the hallway, leading you by hand to a small, cozy looking room.

“This is it. A room of your own. I hope you like it!” Toriel beams at you, as your thoughts and confusing butterflies flutter from your stomach to your head.

She can just give me a whole room? I thought she would be upset that I left when she told me not to. She baked me a pie, and she doesn’t even know me, she gave me a cellphone, and I haven’t done anything for her and-

Your thoughts stop as she slowly pats you on the head and guilt gives way to happiness. You don’t understand this kindness, it almost hurts, and you don’t know what to say. You haven’t done anything to deserve this.

Luckily she turns before she can see you cry, hurrying off to the kitchen fussing about something burning and saying to take a nap the pie will be done when you wake you must be weary.

You enter the small cozy room, still to unsure to really touch anything too much, but when you touch the covers of the bed, you feel they are the softest you have ever touched, and you don’t remember the last time you slept in a bed so warm. You can’t help but cocoon yourself in the loving warmth of the blankets almost greedily soaking up the heat, realizing just how long you’ve been wandering in snowy mountains and dark caverns. All of the tension of the day eases away from you as you drift into a slumber.

 

_“Frisk, you need to listen to me! What have I ever done to you to make you not listen?”_

_“You can be so…! So….!”_

_“…..”_

_“I can never stay mad at that cute smile. I’m sorry sweetie.”_

_“Why couldn’t you wait for me!?”_

_“Don’t you know I love you? I’ve done enough for you haven’t I?”_

_“Frisk, I’m trying, But this is difficult for me. You aren’t making it easier by being stubborn.”_

_“You don’t appreciate anything I’ve done!”_

 

_“How could you do this to me?”_

You wake up with tears in your eyes. What are you doing!? Where are you? How long have you been asleep? Whipping the blankets off your bed you stand up and nearly step into a piece of pie sitting on the ground.

It smells good.

It probably tastes good too…

But. You can’t take anything more from her.  You need to leave, now! You should have left so long ago, you don’t want to hurt her any more than you’ve already done!

Leaving the pie on the ground, you head for the living room where a fireplace is flickering.

Toriel is sitting quietly, reading her book in her armchair.

She notices you and speaks to you gently, asking about your sleep, talking about all the wonderful things she’s prepared for you and how happy you’ll be staying here with her, and how happy it’ll make her as well. You barely hear what she says over your own thoughts, impatiently squirming within you until your blurt our your question.

“Toriel how do I leave the ruins?” Nervously Toriel deflects the question with more information about her home, making you more anxious to know.

You ask her again. She deflects

You ask her once last time and she gets up to leave saying she must attend something, worry and fear in her eyes. You don’t let her get far, chasing after her down to the basement.

When you reach her she stops and speaks.

“You wish to know how to return “Home”, do you not? Ahead of us lies the ends of the ruins.”

“I am going to destroy it.” Fear spikes through you as she heads off again, you follow, running at her heels, internally begging her to stop.

“Every human that falls down here meets the same fate. I have seen it again and again. They come. They leave. They die.” So many unspoken fearful words die on your lips, but she isn’t dead, how could she have died, how would you know what happened to her you didn’t even see her pass through!

“You naïve child, if you leave the ruins…They…Asgore…will kill you. I am only protecting you, do you understand?” You shake your head, eyes burning with tears.

“…..Go to your room.” Again you follow her.

“Do not try to stop me. This is your final warning.” And again you press onwards.

She finally stops at the door.

“You want to leave so badly? You are just like the others…”

“There is only one solution to this…” She finally turns to face you.

“Prove yourself….Prove to me you are strong enough to survive.” That strange and yet now familiar sensation surrounds you once again as you feel the waves of her magic strength against your Soul.

Fires blare up around you as you try to speak with her, reason with her, anything!

You finally stand still and let her attacks hit you, and refuse to fight.

Saddened she looks away from you, begging to fight her or leave.

But you refused.

“Stop.”

“Stop looking at me that way.” The flames avoid you as you hurt more and more. She can no longer bare to face you as she begs you to stay, begs you to understand.

Toriel smiles through her budding tears as her flames finally dissipate.

“I promise I will take care of you.” It hurts, but you cannot give in. You can’t abandon her.

“We can have a good life here.” You can do nothing but shake your head. Blinking away memories of soft hands and soft blankets.

“Why are you making this so difficult?” you shake your head more fiercely, too upset to string together words. No! that’s not..

Toriel then becomes silent as you stand there looking upset.

“Ha…ha…, Pathetic, is it not? I cannot even save a single child. No, I understand. You would just be unhappy trapped here.” You finally look up at her and she sadly gazes upon you.

“It would not be right for you to grow up in such a small place as this.”

“My expectations, my loneliness, my fear….for you, my child, I will put them aside. If you wish to leave, I will not stop you.” Finally Toriel steps to the side. Now the guilt instead consumes you. Guilt because you cannot betray her. And Guilt because you have hurt someone who did not deserve it, and now you cannot make it better. You've been ungrateful of her...!

“However, when you leave. Please do not come back.” Your head jerks up at that one as guilty apologizes nearly spill from your lips as you reach for her almost unconsciously, no I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to disappoint you, I’m sorry! But before you can speak she reaches down and holds you close, and she is as warm as her magic fires.

“I hope you understand. Goodbye, my child.” She tightly holds you one last time before she gets up, and you run away out the door before you can stop yourself from leaving.

Your teardrops freezing before they even reach the ground, sparkling and frozen in shape in the snow.... it fills you with determination.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also, its starting to get sad now. I'm trying to make the parallel between Toriel and Frisk's mom as solid as I can, to solidify how similar and yet how different they are. Since one of my headcanons is that the chapter with Toriel does directly parallel what happened with Frisk's mother in a strange way. But with like, one being a bad or unhappy example, and one being the happy or good example.
> 
> But Frisk is torn, because like all small children, Frisk is unable to comprehend that the problem is in the situation itself, and not within themselves. If something is wrong, it is because they did something wrong. So when similar and yet different situations occur that make you feel guilty no matter which you choose, if you could even choose a thing like that... Frisk feels guilt and shame at themselves for being unable to figure out the answer or choice that hurts nobody
> 
> (starting to, uh, project a bit onto Frisk here a lil bit Iol But I did say this is how I personally perceived Frisk and their reactions or lack of throughout the game soooo)
> 
> Also the Italics in the middle is supposed to be Frisk remembering their mother in their sleep. If you've also, throughout this chapter I've purposely been only mentioning this mysterious "Her" whenever possible  
> Its meant to be interpreted as whoever you think it is, meant to highlight the parallel I guess  
> Is it Toriel, Frisk's Mom, or Both even? Who Knows!
> 
> Also, I could have even left it more ambiguous if I hadn't put the "MOM!" in the first chapter, could made it a sister or a grandma, any sort of female guardian.
> 
> But Mother feels most appropriate.
> 
> And then Frisk gets kinda nonverbal when upset I've noticed. Their very low verbal anyway. Anything that can be said with a nod or a vague wiggly hand gesture usually gets them through most things, but they'll speak if it's really necessary, they just prefer not to, and don't really at all when their very upset or confused.


End file.
